Wonderful World of Disney

Going to be taking the family to Disneyworld. You may never hear from me again.

My only question: How is it possible to have no clothes and this negative thing, this black hole of style, weighs five thousand pounds? That's what I want to know. It's a mystery. Stephen Hawking needs to get right on that.

While I'm at the House of Mouse, Harriet Miers will be flagalated. Louis Farrakhan will wax elephant on explosives and dikes (not dykes, dikes). Burmese pythons will try to eat alligators. Iraq will attempt a democracy and for that many innocent people will get incinerated by nutjobs. The Astros will get their collective asses handed to them by the Braves.....again. Hey, wait a minute, the Astros won and are playing the Cardinals!

All in all, it will be a normal week and a half, which is to say completely nuts, but it will all go on anyway.

So, if Playhouse Disney or Rolie Polie Olie or a bunch of pre-feminist, needy princesses lock me in a room somewhere to rot, please know that I'll die fulfilled--my kids will have met Winnie-the-Pooh in person. What could be better than that? That's right! Nothin'!